There Is a Way Through This
It’s me, Kathleen - the founder of Third Way Conflict Specialists.
I might not know you yet, but I do know that if you’re here, you’re hurting.
I know what this pain feels like, and how far it can spread — but I also know that it doesn’t have to stay this way.
In my twenty years of working with children, teens and families as a teacher, a camp counsellor and an anti-bullying specialist, I’ve never once encountered a bullying situation that couldn’t be resolved.
In fact, I believe you already know what to do to solve your current problem. The solution is within you — and with the right help, you can set it free.
"You gave her permission to stand up for herself but always maintain dignity and empathy for "the bully". Best of all? She used her strong voice and the bullying ended!" — Michelle (mom of 10-year-old daughter)
And You Hold The Key
Your child might not be in the driver’s seat, but they do hold the keys. If we work together, I’ll guide your child towards finding the solution that feels right to them — one that will resolve their situation quickly, and permanently.
The more I work with clients, the more I’m convinced that the most powerful solutions come from listening to the child.
Here’s a story about a three-year-old boy we worked with who was being bullied at school. He’s a funny kid — in fact, his humour was his superpower.
Another boy at school was constantly chasing and threatening him. This boy was terrified, but after we worked together on a solution, he was prepared for the next time the boy confronted him. The next time the boy chased him, he knew what to do. He turned around, faced the other boy, and wiggled his finger at him. “Abracadabra, you’re a frog!” he shouted. The other little boy began to laugh. And when laughter happens, power dynamics dissolve. It’s weird, but it worked.
Magic spells won’t work for every child, and that’s okay. It’s also true that solutions for young children look very different to solutions for older children. What matters is that the solution we build together feels right for your child and your situation.
"My solution was actually FUN and funny! I can’t believe that I went from so scared to looking forward to confronting the kid who is bullying me in a pretty calm way."
It’s about finding their voice
Bullying can make even the most confident of children feel small and silenced.
We’re here to help you child to find their voice - a voice that is capable, respectful, and strong. I call this their strong and kind voice, and it will help them to stand up for themselves with confidence and compassion. Strong and kind sounds different on everyone — for the three-year-old magician above, strong and kind meant fun, and funny.
Finding their voice helps them find their power, but it also educates the person who is choosing aggression, and in turn, it strengthens our communities. In any bullying situation, we’ll find a resolution inspired by decency, kindness, and humanity.
And discovering their power
People deal with conflict in one of three ways. Powering over leads to meanness and aggression.
Powering under leads to silence and shutting down. Powering over and powering under aren’t a reflection of who they are — they’re just coping mechanisms. We all learn them, but we can also unlearn them.
Everyone is capable of powering with, which means standing up for themselves without hurting others. We call this the Third Way, and if we work together, we’ll develop a power with or a strong and kind solution.
“I feel calm again. I haven’t felt calm in months.”
What guardians have said
Where to begin about the amazing service provided to my daughter and I during a difficult time. My 10 year old daughter, Lexi, was dealing with a difficult bully and a very low self esteem. As a mom I was sad and worried and not seeing results from the school system in addressing the issues. Meeting with Kathleen was like meeting up with a great friend, feeling instantly comfortable. She created an atmosphere that was easy to open up in but as a strong mom I appreciated her ability to show my daughter strength and confidence and leadership. She provided real-world (and personal) examples and guidance and instruction on how to use her voice with courage. She gave her permission to stand up for herself but always maintain dignity and empathy for "the bully". She quickly became someone Lexi respected and looked up too (that was not mom). She truly cared and this was evident in so many ways. And as a mom I no longer felt so alone, I truly felt like I had not only a professional to help but a friend as well. Thank-you Kathleen from the bottom of my heart!
You gave her permission to stand up for herself and always maintain dignity and empathy for "the bully".
How we work with kids and guardians
If you or a child you care for needs help with bullying, the first thing we’ll do is book a free discovery call to find out more about your situation. If we believe we can help, and if you believe we’re the team you’d like to work with, we’ll work to resolve your bullying situation over the course of four sessions. With my background in teaching and my training in mediation, I’m skilled at working with both adults and children. We help children and adults work together to find a solution they’ll actually follow through with, and one that always prioritises the health and safety of your child.Work with me!
“Because of this CCC NOTHING is happening at school to me. This has never happened to me – school is finally calm.”
Learn more about our methods
These sessions are family sessions. We’ll sit down with your child and the other members of your family you’d like to involve, listen to your situation, and guide each of you through a proven framework for resolving the conflict. If you feel our presence would be helpful in your meetings with the school or your conversations with teachers, we’ll be there for you.
90% of cases we work with are permanently resolved in three sessions or less, but you always have the option to see us again if anything comes up.
What kids have said
Get the Solutions Package Today
"I was so sad because I was getting bullied at school, but because of Kathleen, I’m now so happy. I highly recommend her." — James
“My solution was actually FUN and funny! I can’t believe that I went from so scared to looking forward to confronting the kid who is bullying me in a pretty calm way.” — Joanna
“I feel calm again. I haven’t felt calm in months.” — Hannah
“It just feels good. I feel good. I feel like me again.” — Bryan
“Because of this CCC NOTHING is happening at school to me. This has never happened to me – school is finally calm.” — Emma
GET TO THE BOTTOM OF BULLYING
Feel hopeful for the first time in a long time, with the right tools you can get to the bottom of it.
© 2022 Third Way Conflict Specialists.